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Where Do You Weigh In

Posted on July 9, 2013 at 1:46 AM Comments comments (21)
Colo. gay discrimination alleged over wedding cake Colo. gay couple files discrimination complaint alleging baker denied them wedding cake via Yahoo News

When will enough be enough? According to this article this male gay couple wants to get married and went  to this bakery and wanted to have a wedding cake made. The owner does not believe in same sex marriage and refused their services. The couple is now taking the owner to court for refusing to do their wedding cake citing discrimination. So my question is what is your take on the matter?

Personally I stand by the word of God where marriage is concern. As an officiant I have had several same sex couples attempt to obtain our service I have declined because I have to stand on God's Word. I'm bound by my beliefs. Since I am bound by this then it does not mean that I hate the couple or don't like them or what they are doing. However just as they have the right of choice then so do I. 

Where I find problems with these same sex couples is their attempt to want their rights understood and pushed regardless of everyone else's. People have the right to pick and choose. As a store owner you can refuse services that you don't want to take. To push this cake issue is too much when you can go somewhere else and have the cake of your dreams done in the way that you want. Your wedding day should be the best ever. 

You should have the day that you dreamed of. Why force someone to do something that they don't believe in. Many say it's the same as a black person being refused because they are black, or a Jewish person refused because they are Jewish. I don't see it that way. While we had to fight for our rights we did not attempt to force people to accept us by forcing  them to do something that they were against. I'm all for all people including those who are gay to be treated equally but that does not mean that you force me to go against my religious beliefs or you are going to make me.

The gays that do this are like bullies who feel that they must have their way no matter what. If you don't like it then they will force you to do it. A cake....really .....you want to destroy a person's business for a cake. Or you want to force a place like Chick-fila who states and stands by their religious beliefs because you want them to accept how you feel. That's not right. We are not trying to deny any one from loving. I for one will not judge it's not my place. In the same way I will not force you to do something you don't want to do and expect the same from you. Respect for each other is what is important. 

Now I don't know all of the ends and outs of the case. I don't know if the owner stated to all that his wedding cakes are made only for those who have the same belief. I'm not sure. Or if he said I will do the cake but will not add the same sex topper. I personally feel that the couple should go to a place where their service would be handled in the way that they want and maybe not recommend that bakery to their friends. 

I could be wrong but I am not trying to offend I just feel that we have far too many other problems and concerns that we need to attend to then a wedding cake. So how do you feel about this issue?


What To Do When You Think Your In-Laws Hate You

Posted on June 3, 2013 at 8:14 AM Comments comments (9)
Most of the time we see where the spouse has a problem with the in-laws. Most of the time it's the female spouse dealing with the mother of the male spouse. They just don't click and the spouse that is coming into the relationship will automatically have a dislike for the in-law. However this post is talking about when the In-laws really hate the spouse. It could be the male spouse or the female spouse. So we are going to take a look at what you should do when your In-laws just hate you for no real reason. Or for reasons that they might not have addressed to you.

You being the hated spouse have no hard feelings towards your in-laws. In fact you found it most surprising that you have sense this negativity towards you when you have attempted to be the additional child in the new family dynamics. Many times it's not what they have said but what you have perceived. You have mentioned these feelings to your spouse only for him/her to say that it's not true. While your spouse can attempt to smooth things over between you he/she can't dictate how your in-laws actions or words make you feel. 

Some actions that might help when you are preceding this negative actions or comments from your in-laws.

Step One- Open loving communication with your spouse:
Always go directly to your spouse in a serious yet loving way. Tell your spouse your true feelings about how you feel about his family. Remain calm as you converse with him. Be careful not to offend your spouse's family. Use your "I" words. For example instead of saying "Your mother thinks she knows it all and attempts to put me down in a sneaky way in front of you and others." Say it this way: "I feel that some of the comments that your mother says about me in front of others makes me feel as though she is putting me down. It hurts my feelings and I am embarrass." You might want to call her the evil bride of the devil himself but don't do this while speaking to your spouse. That is his/her mother and you would not like anyone speaking bad about your mother or father. If you don't handle the conversation with love then you may open a door that can never be closed again. Pick your time and make sure you are not angry at the time.

Step Two- Apologize, forgive, and forget:
You will have to be the bigger person. You may not feel that you have done anything wrong, but some problem had occurred. Rather than allowing everything that you have had building up inside of you loose simply apologize for whatever role you played in creating the tension. Now this is the hard part you must forgive your in-laws. You must move pass the negativity for the sake of your family. Your spouse will see that you are trying your best and will take a second look at his/her parents. If your spouse see that it's not you then your spouse will come to your aid. 

Step Three- Try to meet their needs:
Open up for dialog. You need to talk with your in-laws to see what it is they want of you or from you. Have your spouse with you when this is done, make an honest attempt. If you find out that there is really something expected and you do it then expect to see things change. If they do not then you know you have attempted and leave it at that. Your spouse will know that you did your best. Some people will just not like you no matter what, but at least you have given it all you have and you can be polite to your in-laws. This will keep your spouse happy and your children. Be Christ like no matter what. Pray for them and one day there will be peace in your marital life. 

As a spouse you want your family to have peace and harmony. You are the only one that can make that happen. If you don't argue and keep hate going then it can't grow. Purpose in your heart even if you have to keep distance that you will not be the cause of friction between your spouse and your family. As  long as you have the Lord leading then your situation will change for your well good and His glory.

 





Is Reality TV Good For Marriage

Posted on April 12, 2013 at 6:33 AM Comments comments (5)
I have to make a confession I really like the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Now with that said this season I have to admit that it really got on my last nerve. I'm going to be honest I'm not sure if I will watch it next season. Why? I was just not pleased with what they have shown me about marriage. First of all there are only three ladies that are actually married. So how can you call yourself the Real Housewives? Second the ladies acted like middle school bad girls. The older ladies who have been married or were married treated the youngest married lady really bad. While she was not very knowledgeable and appeared as if she was an airhead she was married and attempting to live the housewife life. She was trying to honor her marriage and what her husband wanted. While I felt that somethings were a bit overboard but then again they had only been married for two years.

The ladies were stating to her that her husband was controlling and that she should be her own woman. While there was some truth to that still that was her marriage and no two marriages are alike. The sad part is that after the season was over it has been stated that the couple are heading for divorce. Could it had been the pressure of the show? She being around the ladies who are all self-made ladies and have a career? Was it because her husband really is controlling and does not want her on the show? Could it had been because the show was just not good for their marriage. 

I don't know the answer to this question but my limited research has shown that on the entire housewife franchise there have been over 13 breakups while the couples have been on these shows. Maybe showing your day to day marriage with its up's and down's for all the world to see may not be the best thing for marriage. I understand wanting to work and to be on the air but if it's going to affect the marriages then is it worth it?

I still feel that while we love to take a peek at these exciting people it's not worth loosing your marriage over it. I'm at fault because I'm one of the ones that will sit there and wait for the show to come on. I could be the part of the group that is causing couples in this high profile to break-up. I am praying for the young couple who I have pictured here that with good Christian counseling and help from their pastor with prayer that they will become the couple that they should be. Two years married is not very long and they need to give it another try and work harder on it. 

Now the last thing I must confess....I'm not sure that I won't be back next season waiting to see the outcome...what can I say I'm only human...lol. Give us your comments on Marriage and the real housewives.

Did You Marry Your Soul Mate?

Posted on March 20, 2013 at 8:14 AM Comments comments (7)
Have you ever looked at your spouse and wondered..."hum is he/she my real soul mate?" I hope not. But if you have or just want to make sure that you have the soul mate created for you by God then it would be great to look at ten tips that will let you know.
 
2R1N CHRIST has been blessed to have an association with a lovely couple who's ministry is leading singles to their soul mate. I love their dedication to the work that God had entrusted them with and just wanted to share some of the tips that they have developed. 
 
With that said I present: Ten Ways to Know if you have met (or married in our case) your soul mate  by Petula & Dexter Jones from their book SOUL MATE OR JUST ANOTHER DATE....Dexter L. Jones
According to the Jones:

1. Know yourself and know what type of characteristics, traits and personality you want in a soul mate and don't deviate and accept less than what you know you are satisfied with. Does that person match that?
Since most of us on 2r1n Christ are already married then you know already if your spouse fits you or not. I can say without a doubt that my husband is right there for me. Many of us did not go into marriage wondering if your spouse was the one. Now if you are having problems with character, traits and personality then you are a unit now and building your marriage on Jesus. Commit to rededicating your lives and marriage to God and ask Him to form any imperfections that you find in each other. Seek a Christian counselor or your pastor for help.

2. Do you have a witness and peace in your spirit and heart about this individual in your life? If you do not then slow it down and make sure that you are led of the Spirit.
I can say that I knew without a doubt that I was brought to him as his mate for life. I really had a very strong witness from the Holy Spirit. You should know this by now. As you grow closer together in God He will take any doubts that might come up about coming together away. But  as you read these in hindsight you can see that yes indeed you are with your soulmate.

3. The two of you seem to naturally flow together, there is a great spiritual and soul (mental ) connection between the two of you.
Being married to my best friend we have connected in every way. The good thing is that so far I know that most of the couples reading this knows that they are with their soul mates.

4. To look at this person is like looking at an image of you.
Yes I can see that and its good to know that your spouse mirrors you on the inside.

5. When you've met your soul mate the two of you will display the utmost honesty and support for one another and this person will make you (the female) feel beautiful and satisfied? This person will make you (the male) feel like you're very worthy and able to accomplish anything.
I can just hear all of my married couples yelling now "I did it right I'm with my soul mate."

6. With your soul mate it's like you've known this person for a longtime even though the time has been brief.
Remember that this is set up for a single person. You know this already and when you think back on it you will remember what you felt when you met. I would look at my now husband then friend and think I want to sit across from him always. I felt as if we had always been right from the very start.

7. Your soul mate and you are very harmonious and can work well together.
We can understand that nothing is trouble free but when you are with your spouse and you are for the most part working together and in harmony with each other 9times out of 10 you are with your soulmate.

8. Both of you are very supportive of one another and desire to see growth in each other in every area of life.
I can just see all of my married couples jumping for joy. Looking at each other knowing that without any doubts in your mind that you are with your soulmate.

9. Your soul mate accepts you for you; they're not in the business of trying to change you. They're like a best friend.
Its time for the praise dance. You have landed your soul mate and now the two of you are one.

10. Your soul mate adores the time they have with you and aren't afraid to make a commitment to you.
You will never have to wonder if your spouse is your soul mate or not. You are with that person.
 
While this should be a study that one should have been a part of before marriage it doesn't hurt the married couple to stop and remember when. I for one have enjoyed looking back over our beginnings and to look at where we are now. Knowing that you and your spouse are put together for a life time by God will continue to cement your marriage and relationship together for the duration of your lives.
 
  
  
 
 

Facebook and Your Marriage

Posted on December 3, 2012 at 7:50 PM Comments comments (33)
 Do you think that posting about your marriage on Facebook is a good thing or a bad idea? While I feel that it's a great arena for positive encouragement, mentoring and teaching I find that many use it to brag or provide a false image of their union to make the world think that they are happy when they are not. 

I don't think its good to post on Facebook about what's going on in your household. We don't need to know if your husband brought you a new this or that. We don't need to know what you fixed for dinner or didn't. We don't need to see pictures of you kissing and looking into each others eyes as if the world was there when you two are fighting in real life. 

If your marriage is a fantasy that's great if that is what you two want. However we don't need to see something fake and think its real. What that does is cause someone who is in a difficult season of marriage or who is not married to want what you have or envy your marriage thinking that something must be wrong with them.

You don't need to use that media to air your dirty laundry either. We don't need to know these things. We need to see something that is real. Something that will edify our marriages and teach us how to live and love each other as God created marriage to be. Many times I read some of the post and I know the couple personally. I know that they are having grave martial issues that need a Christian counselor to assist them.

Yet I read the post on Facebook with one or the other couple stating how much they love each other. What a wonderful day they had and how their marriage is so great. They don't need to pretend to the Facebook world that their life is so great nor do they have to talk about how bad it is. What they should be doing instead of posting fake nonsense is communicating with each other and working on solving the real issues in their marriage.

Developing a daily marital life is hard enough that you don't need to have the world peeping into your marriage window. The moment that the truth comes out then you have invited others to put their mouth on your relationship. Many are hoping and praying against your union because you have invited others to look at your perfect martial world and because its fantasy envy sets in then jealousy. 

Your marriage must remain between the two of you and God. As marriage and relationship ministry leaders we have to sometimes open up our union for teaching purposes. We made a deal with each other that certain things would never be exposed to the public even in teaching. We made a vow with God to present our ministry from the truth. We give you the good and the bad along with solutions.

What I'm trying to say is that I'm not against Facebook or social media. I have many true virtual friends. I always attempt to give a positive word from God as much as I can. When I do speak about my marriage I do not attempt to make anyone feel slighted because they are not married or their marriage is currently in a difficult season. We as children of God must be mindful of each other and always walk in truth with love. Now do I fall short of this? Of course because I am not The Christ...but I try very hard to do what will help build the body. I know that my assignment is in the area of marriage and relationship and God holds me accountable for falsehood. 

So next time that you just want to brag about your perfect marriage then tell it to your spouse. Don't get on Facebook and let the world know when you really need to only keep such things between your spouse and God. Understand there is nothing wrong with an honest post about something you find great about your mate and your marriage. But make sure its something that's uplifting and would edify the people. 

We don't need to know your everyday as if to say in your face losers because I'm married and perfect and you are not. Remember social media can be a great tool for building the Kingdom of God. Just remember that what you write is there to stay and should be a way to help somebody. 

Am I the only one who does not understand polyamory?

Posted on September 2, 2012 at 12:02 AM Comments comments (8)
Now that I'm retired I have gone back to my up all night ways. I am a natural night person. I become more creative at night so I'm up at night working on ministry, business or my great American novel....yea the last one is a laugh. 

As I find myself up and my husband is asleep I turn on the TV just to have background sound. I have watched or should I say listened to some great cable shows and movies. I do like reality shows that have something to do with life, ministry, love, or business. I like to see people go after their dreams and set out to do the impossible. This motivates me at this vintage age to live my life the way I've always wanted to. OK enough about me but I do have a point to make so please just stick with me. 

So as I heard what was coming on next on one of these stations I heard that the next show would be taking about marriage and dating. Being me I got excited. How I love married couples dating each other each week or more. So I wanted to see what it was all about. The show was called "Polyamory marriage and dating". For those that know about polyamory I can hear you laughing at me now. To my surprise this was not the show that I thought it would be at all. In fact I stopped what I was doing when I realized what was going on and stared with my mouth open. I could not watch it all but I did get enough of it.

Things are worse than I thought where marriage as God has created it to be. People have decided that what God created is not good enough. They are saying that He (God) created something that needs to change with the changing times. That we as Christians must adapt and allow people to love as they choose to. I have no problems with them loving whomever. What I do have a problem with when they attempt to make my Lord appear outdated. That what He deemed orderly and correct is not. That a human creature can do better than the creator.

So what was the show about. I will tell you right now it had nothing to do with marriage and dating your husband. The definition of "Polyamory" is Poly= many or several (Greek root). Amor= love (Latin root). So polyamory means many or several loves. The show focused on two polyamory relationship. One group were considered a tirade which consisted of a legal married couple male and female who were engaged and living with another female who was going to be married (and I use the term loosely) to both and she considered herself the girlfriend of both of them.

They lived in the same home and slept in the same bed. Where everyone had sex with everyone. The married couple were sharing their wedding anniversary and stated that sometimes it was hard for them to be together and have alone time. The second group consisted of a legal married couple male and female. Who invited their love couple (who were married to each other) to move in with them and had a group marriage. Along with the original couple the wife has a outside girlfriend that she is not ready to share with the rest of the polygamous family. 

Honestly I can't tell you anymore than that because I turned. It didn't make any sense to me. What the couples were saying to prove their lifestyle was that monogamy caused people to be unstable and have the tendency and desire to cheat. It offered them the temptation to be dishonest. However polyamory was based on truth. You could have a relationship with anyone in the family group. You were married to everyone in the group.

They went so far as to have these so called commitment ceremonies that united the group as husbands and wives. They stated that the practice, desires, are acceptance of having more than one loving intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. They stated that it is distinct from swinging which emphasizes sex with others as merely recreational. Or  from polysexuality which is attraction towards multiples genders and or sexes. What really got to me was the fact that both of the legally married couples stated in a round about way that there was some jealousy and no real privacy. 

Really guys am I the only one appalled with this lifestyle parading as a marriage? Not only that on TV for all to see and think that this was a real and true way of life and marriage. For them to say that this is what marriage should be. To allow people to come up with any and everything and push it on us as marriage. Then march for their rights to have this foolishness called marriage. 

People we are in bad shape. No wonder God is calling us out on marriage as an issue. Our Lord is counting on us to live a moral life. If marriage is destroyed then the family as a whole breaks down. We wonder why America is falling. Our core is breaking. We are so busy being politically correct that we are no longer Godly correct. If we that know how things should be don't stand up for what is right our children and our children's children and their children will have nothing solid to fall back on. This polyamory life style does not make sense.

If you look at what they are doing and saying then you can see that those in this situation have problems. The wife that had the couple living with them and the outside girl friend who by the way was married was jealous of her husband having a relationship with her girlfriend yet they say that this lifestyle produced honesty. A union such as marriage can not grow properly when you include more people in the mix. Those of us that are married know that its difficult to say the least to work hard on the marriage daily to allow it to grow. 

We would tell you without Jesus we would not make it. If we didn't have Him as our rock then we would not remain together or move forward. In this polyarmoy union with the married couple and the two other people plus outside girlfriend had children. I didn't watch the show long enough to see the interaction they had with the children. What I saw was the main wife telling the child that the couple would be living with them soon. 

I also saw that there were problems between the main wife and the new woman moving in with her mate living in the home. This woman did not feel comfortable in the home because the main wife set all the rules and the other woman in the union stated that she felt like she was back home living with parents asking for permission. None of it made sense and maybe if I watched the show to the end I would have received a better form of knowledge to why this form of  "marriage" should be allowed or considered as standard. 

But alas I could not watch this mess another second and just sat there with my mouth opened and wanted to understand the thinking for putting this reality show on the air for anyone to watch. I have often stated that marriage as God created it was on the attack and now my eyes are wide open and I see it as a horrible attack from the enemy of God to upset the apple cart and destroy all that is good and moral.

You might think that I'm coming down hard on this lifestyle and I'm sorry I am. I can only see our nucleus being destroyed the foundation of the family. I can only see destruction of all things that are good and holy. We who know the truth and follow God's word and laws we must work on our marriage. We must study to show ourselves approved so that we can teach the children. So that we won't enter into marriage without proper knowledge and once married we will know how to keep it growing and united. 

All I could see from this program and lifestyle is "Lust". Lust will never make a marriage. It is not the glue needed to build a lifetime on. Marriage must have that Godly cord as the foundation to stabilize the union. He should be the head of the union and the guide of the relationship. He should be the one you turn to. Not the TV or news media or the politically correct people. 

I would love for every man and woman to be happy. You will not find that from things without but from the God that's within. He will guide you to all truth. When you have a marriage His way then it will last forever. Sorry guys I see now we can't put our heads in the sand and pretend. We have to learn and lead by His example we owe it to the generations to follow how marriage is suppose to be. 

As always leave your comments tell me what you think about this new form of  " so called marriage" we welcome your opinion. 

Where do I stand?

Posted on June 4, 2012 at 8:24 AM Comments comments (8)

Some might say that I have been avoiding this and for those who are saying it they could be right. However in all honesty it was more like I really didn't want to face the issue or let it be known that there was an issue. But truth be told there is one and as a minister who has a heart for marriage then I knew at one time or another I would have to speak on the matter.

So when asked where did I stand on the current focus on marriage I had no other choice but to give my humble opinion and keep it moving. Marriage as we have grown up to know and understand is under attack. Many feel that things need to be changed and redefine.  They feel that what has worked in its essence since the beginning of man on this earth suddenly needs to change and take on a new face.

I cannot agree with this thinking but not for the reason that most of you would feel that I should. For one I am a minister of God. Which means I have been called into the service of the King for Kingdom building. Who's Kingdom? God's! So I must follow His Word and Will in order to so my share in His Kingdom Building. I have to believe that what He created is righteous and true. I have to believe that what He started in the very beginning to help man was the way it should be.

I must understand that when God looked at all that He had done in creation all was good except that man (Adam) was alone. He had a desire to be united with another of his own kind. Now being the Almighty, all Knowing God then I must believe that He knew what man desired in his heart. I must believe that God put man to sleep and created from him what would be his heart's desire. What would be his life's choice and then once it was done to the very best that man could imagine then more God brought what man so desperately needed and wanted right to him. Once God saw that the gift he gave man completed him that's when God looked at his hand in creation and said all was very good.

Man was so happy and content that when offered paradise to not having that gift from God man choose to sin and was thus put out the garden. So you see it was established from the very beginning that we needed to be in unity with one another. It was also established that once the gift was given to man that then he was to unite in a intimate way and multiply. Thus creating a family and keeping it growing.  

So what was the gift that God brought to man that would allow God to say that creation was now "very good"? What was the gift that would give man all of his needs and desires wrapped up in one? God gave man woman. As simple as that. Woman was the key to creating all that was missing in creation. This is what  God saw as something missing. This is what is needed now to create what is needed for this world to work together. 

We need God as our foundation and man joined with woman to come together as one. Man and woman to keep the world full of fruit in the sense of producing more children to grow up and come together to continue life as we know it. Thus God created the union of marriage with the man and woman being the key parts of that union. God gave man and woman this coming together as their first ministry which would be to keep the world growing with Him and in Him.

So RevLa you have said all of this to say what? You have never stated what your stand is on all this new attack towards the holy institution of marriage. Do you really feel that marriage need to catch up with the times? Don't you feel that all people should have the opportunity to love and be in union with the one that they love?

I will start with the last question first. Yes all people should have the choice to being in union with the person that they feel is the love of their life. I cannot state if being with same sex people as a couple is right or wrong. I can only go by what God has put in place. Thus I cannot see this union as a marriage. I can see that those who are in this relationship should have their rights met. That they should be able to come together with each other in a civil way that allows them to live their life in peace. But this union according to God is not a marriage.

Marriage does not need to change from what God created it to be. He knew what he was doing when He done it. He is an all knowing God. When He said it was "very good" then that sealed it right there. He put man and woman together so they could unite and become one in union with Him. So man's laws cannot change what God's laws created and sealed. Man can create another form of a union based on his laws but can not change what God established and then call it marriage. That will never do and I can not go along with that.

Last in answer to the original question "where do I stand"? Then by now everyone should know. I can only stand in one spot. That spot is the one that God put in place from the very beginning of time. That spot is with God and God alone. Many may not like my stand but that cannot be my determining factor. I have been called out by God to do His Will in His Way. He called me out to stand for Marriage as He has deemed it to be. So that is where I stand. That is what I teach and that is what should be. I have nothing against people wanting to love. I only know that marriage was and is our first ministry given to us by God. We who stand for Him must continue to unite in the way that He has deemed us to.

Marriage has never been an institution but a covenant between man, woman and God. You cannot have a marriage without God in it.

 

 

 

Seek Before You Leap

Posted on January 3, 2012 at 2:40 PM Comments comments (7)
Recently we are seeing people get married one moment and then less than three months they are filing for divorce. Many of these marriages are blasted in front of our faces because these people are considered famous or everything that they do is public knowledge. 
 
There was a time I would not feel for these so called celebrities. I would have thought that they got what they sort...fame. However now i know that people are just that people. We want love and companionship no matter who we are. We all have our ups and our downs but at least when we are down or make a mistake the world does not need to know about it. 
 
Marriage is so important to us that whenever something is going on that involves marriage we look into it. So when a famous singer announced that she and her husband were divorcing after only 16 or 19 days (not sure of the exact number) my heart just hurt. I was upset and felt like here we go again another couple jumping into marriage and pretending. Another couple who does not hold the marriage commitment as sacred. When I voiced this my very own daughter corrected me.
 
She said "mom its not her fault. She didn't know that this would happen. From what I read they had friends who interfered and she found it impossible to be together as a couple. I really think she wanted her marriage." Her statement made me stop and look at the situation more closely. While I still had my reservations I had to wonder why this marriage lasted only days and another couples lasted only two months.
 
I came to one conclusion. While I have no information about the two couples. I'm not sure if they sort counseling or not but I do know that every couple should have pre-marital counseling before they say those "I Do's". As an officiate I marry a lot of couples and whole myself accountable for their union as God holds me. Many couples who seek our service don't use them because I make it clear that they must take the six-week premarital counseling course. 
 
This course is set up so that each aspect of their life is identified with a scenario that the couple as well as myself can discuss. The couple has to talk about as well as write out their answers to the questions. At the end of the course we talk about anything that concerns them face to face. They always have a written account of their sessions for future problems. 
 
Having these sessions are no guarantee that you will have a happy and lasting marriage but these sessions offers you insight as to how your marriage will progress. It offers the couple tools that they can use to help with possible stumbling blocks. It allows them to talk about potential concerns before they happen and it allows the couple to show each other how they will naturally react to the situation.
 
Many couples are so excited about being in love they forget that marriage is suppose to be for a lifetime. Many things can go on in a lifetime. People grow and change marriage does the same thing. Starting out in marriage with realistic goals and holding each party accountable for their role in the marriage. 
 
We teach that God is the Head of the marriage and that all truth is in God. Our marriage must be given over to Him and we must follow His direction. We must remember that marriage was created by Him and it is He who can tell us what is needed and how to last together for a life time.
 
Our marriage ministry has placed a six week pre-marital counseling session online for those couples to obtain and we don't have to be the officiate but we will answer their questions and give them God's guidance. Marriage is too important to enter into it lightly or without help. We must understand each other and attempt to go into it to last for the duration of our lives. We must learn that the couples goal is to become one together in Christ Jesus.
 
My prayer is that those celebrities who are going through this difficult period  would seek God to comfort them and to show them who their true mates are. Also that all couples before marriage seek counseling so that they have a chance to have that bliss know as a happy loving marriage.   

Has it come to this..we have to marry a vampire inorder to be happily married?

Posted on December 2, 2011 at 1:42 PM Comments comments (9)
I am a lover of fiction. That is the best way for me to relax. To sit down with my favorite beverage and in my cozy chair. With my blanket with the arms already on it that way I won't get cold as I turn the pages of my book or press the bottom on my nook. Don't get me wrong I love reading the latest vampire craze. However what gets me is to see that the only way it seems that anyone can be in love or have a happy marriage is to be with a vampire.
 
I do understand the Twilight craze and True Blood. In fact I like both of these (well maybe not all of the Twilight saga) and they make the vampire lover so alluring. He out shines any man that God could ever create. But lets face it people not only is it fiction if this so call lover existed he or she would be dead. How in the world could anyone want to be touched by something dead? Having a spouse that when you touch them they feel cold as ice. When you lay on their chest there is no heartbeat. And in the latest part of the Twilight saga Breaking dawn she not only marry the vampire but gets pregnant. Ok this is a stretch even for me. A dead man creating life with a living woman....really!!!
 
Believe it or not there are ladies and some men who are secretly wishing that they could marry a vampire. How crazy is that? Has marriage sunk that low that we would rather be with a fictious dead man or woman who happens to come out at night and live on the blood of the living. Is that what love and marriage is all about? Us desiring to share our intimate lives with an undead creature.
 
Sure its fun and entertaining and really would make a great date night movie adventure. But its when I see or hear people emulating the vampire life because they would rather be this creature than what God has made them thats when I start to see just how sick the world is becoming. I'm for married couples playing out their fantasies with each other during their datenight fun time however that's where it should end.
 
Many reading this may think that I'm taking it to the extreme. But how much does TV and movies influence the lives of the young and the lonely?
I know for one when I was young and read the romance novels I expected life and love to be just that way. I looked for the knight in shinning amour. I expected my married life with my knight to be happily ever after. But the truth of the matter is that we are living in the real world.
 
A world that's hard and some times uncaring. A world that will not show love in the way that it was created to be. That's why we need God. We need Him to guide us into all truth and teach us how to love each other and to be mates for life. When we follow the creator of love and marriage than we will be able to endure in this harsh world. We will be able to stay together during the hard seasons of marriage.
 
We will desire each other instead of looking at fiction and wanting our lives to be like the minds of a gifted writer. Marriage is always a work in progress. When we remember that then there is nothing that will come our way that we can not work together with God as our leader and solve.
 
Personally I don't do well with cold. I don't like cold weather and I know I could not live with a cold dead person and having that person drinking my blood or even the blood of animals to live. That person who could never walk in the sun light or as the latest vampire stories they can walk in the sun light but will glow and appear strange. This is fiction and makes a wonderful spooky story. But that's where it stays in fiction land.
 
When we get married we come together to become one in Christ Jesus. We build our lives on the rock of God and there is nothing that will bring us down as long as we follow the real author of the life novel.
 
Don't get caught up in the nonsense of the world. Remember that the Creator makes all the rules. Love the living and enjoy one another as you grow together. Allowing Jesus to direct and guide your union.
 
So what do you think?..... let's talk about it.

Honey...what does love mean to you?

Posted on September 1, 2011 at 4:28 AM Comments comments (30)
LOVE
 a simple four letter word that packs so much meaning. We all have our concepts of that word. Many wars have been started in the name of love. Couples break up because they have different ideas of what love is. When asked you may get many answers. Some may say that love is a deep feeling of happiness. Others will say that love is an attraction. There are those who will say that its deeper than just liking someone. Its more than just friendship.
 
You have many who may think of love only on the physical terms meaning that love is a physical act. You have your bible scholars that will give you the meaning of unconditional acceptance. They will tell you that its a planned choice to love instead of an emotional one.
 
You will have yet still those who believe that love is only emotional or just intellectual or psychological. The thing is this when asked each person will have their own preconceived notion of love. Therein is where the problem lies. Most couples never take the time to find out what their mate may think love is.
 
When met with difficult seasons of marriage they result to thinking that the other is not showing them love. Many times that person is showing the love that they know and feel. Unless the other spouse fully understands what their mates concept of love is then they will never know if they are truly being loved by their spouse.
 
The bible teaches us that we have not because we don't ask. Such a simple thing to do. One day when you are not in conflict just relax and ask your spouse to tell you what they believe love is. Then you tell them what you see love as. Meet in the middle and always attempt to love your spouse in the way that they want to be loved. That is the choice in loving. Choosing to love your mate in the way that they would want to be loved.
 
Now the next time you are in a relax non-physical stimulating moment and just need to get your talk on I personally think that you need to ask a question.
 
How about this:
Honey....what does love mean to you?
 You never know it might lead you to that glorious physical moment afterwards!